I was always worried about my daughter. Is it fun to grow in the body? I promised she would understand that the brain is more important than breasts and humor is more attractive than hair. I’ve been trying to incorporate these feelings into our conversations for years and even though I’m not ready to declare success yet (he’s only 14), I think he’s got the message.
But what about my son? Suddenly I became nervous about the image of her body. Are you happy with your body? More annoying: Did I know I wouldn’t?
I am a health psychologist, professor and body image scientist. But when I tried to involve my son in a body image conversation, he was reluctant to speak. It’s really more than that – It’s as if he has nothing to say about the body. After 25 years of body image research, I have found that my personal experiences can be seen in many.
I have interviewed dozens of older children 14-24 For my next book “Be You: a body image book for men “ And the conversations often start slowly and awkwardly (a real contrast to my experiences with the girls they interviewed for my other books). Men may say they want bigger bumps and think they should eat tons of protein, but often they can’t explain why.
One boy said he slapped his chest the day before going to school because he was tired of his friends laughing at his “male breasts”. The Scotch tape didn’t do his homework and made him an embarrassing mess to get rid of when he got home that afternoon.
The more I talked to the guys, the more it became clear that they would not win. It is almost impossible that they are tall, skinny At Muscular like the men you see in TikTok bragging about their gym. These bodies require genetic predisposition and unhealthy attention to diet and weight gain.
One man told me: “Every time I wear the shirt in public, I feel uncomfortable and embarrassed.”
It’s clear in their actions – whether it’s lifting weights, cutting carbs, grooming or dressing – that men care and care about their appearance. However, men did not think of their appearance as a problem with body image.
Men (and many of us adults too) think that physical dissatisfaction only affects women. But research suggests otherwise. A recent study It has been found that 75% of young men are dissatisfied with their bodies. Until Half of the men By using supplements such as protein powders during adolescence, they think it will increase their muscle mass. (It won’t be.) Growing part – From the fourth to the third – In patients with eating disorders They are men. The men were obviously ill, but they seemed to be suffering most in silence.
In addition to interviews with menYour presence“I talk to young people who have a history of eating disorders. I’ve heard that they prove what recent studies suggest: Men’s eating disorders are often undetected until their condition is severe. This is partly because men who develop eating disorders do not necessarily have the same symptoms as women. Children can “cleanse” with excessive exercise; They eat more but do not include the whole food group in their diet. Their concerns and psychological distress were present but not addressed.
Often parents, peers, trainers and sometimes even children’s health care workers believe that children are “healthy” when in fact they are sinking into a serious illness. As one man told me, “It wasn’t long before this exercise and my ‘healthy’ diet led to noticeable weight loss. I also found myself obsessed with food. I always wondered if what I ate – and didn’t eat – then.
Dr. Jason Nagata, an expert on children’s body image and eating disorders at the University of California, San Francisco, is one of a growing number of scientists and advocates helping to shed light on children’s weaknesses and characteristics. He told me, “Men with eating disorders can display perfect, large, muscular bodies. They can engage in muscle-strengthening behaviors such as excessive exercise and use of performance-enhancing substances. .
Sure, some men want to lose weight and many want to lose weight and multiply, which has led to the spread of new languages and techniques – storing, cutting and shaving – online. The scientific basis for these skills is questionable and likely to lead to eating disorders.
What makes it worse is that men are smaller than women Ask for help For mental health problems. Nagata points out that the longer you worry about food and body image, the more common they will become. And, in the long run result Eating disorders can be very serious and life threatening; It can affect physical, social and mental development.
When I started writing “Your presence“I wanted to build a resource for my son and teen and teenager boys around the world, but I’m not sure if the experience with‘ men ’is as hard or as serious as women’. I changed my mind.
“Men’s experiences with their bodies are different than women’s experiences,” but it’s just as difficult. They are also bombarded with messages that they need to “fix” the body, but don’t socialize to figure out how to get help when they need it. They may be more likely not to see themselves cuddling in a bikini, but they still don’t want to take off their shirts by the pool. Until we normalize body image conversations between men, they will remain in a parallel world known to women and girls for decades.
Recently, my son went to the gym for the first time with a friend to lift weights. When I got home I asked him if he was always thinking about it. He said: “No, I don’t think so. Do not worry. I am happy with myself for who I am. The body is positive, mom! ”I thought maybe he was just listening.
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Source: Huffpost