on the song love By Nat King Cole Stephane Vauren danced to pay his last respects to his companion, Agnes LaSalle, who was murdered on February 22nd at her high school. The images evoked strong emotions. Two specialists analyze the reasons.
These dance steps will mark the year 2023, some say. These are the steps taken by Stéphane Voirin, the companion of 53-year-old teacher Agnes Lassalle, who was fatally stabbed by one of her students in her classroom at Saint-Thomas-d’Aquin high school in Saint-Jean-de-Luz. , Wednesday, February 22. This is how a man paid his last respects to his companion in the courtyard of the Sainte-Eugénie church in Biarritz after the funeral service on Friday, March 3. Right in front of the casket, he began to dance alone, carried away by the song love, by Nat King Cole. The man was then joined by numerous duets who took turns dancing.
The video shot by the press cameras installed in front of the church was widely spread on social networks and media. “A moment of grace”, “a moment of humanity”, “a lesson of dignity”… The video in the press and networks hit and moved a lot. Many expressed admiration, praised the moment of life in death, lightness in gravity. If this honor moves a lot, it is because it amazes, because it surprises. “Being surprised, we react in two different ways,” notes psychosociologist Dominique Picard (1). either we defend ourselves or we allow ourselves to be penetrated. And in this second case, we identify with the people in action. Seeing Stéphane Voirin’s posture, his dignity, his loving attitude accompanied by a kiss on the coffin, the audience sympathizes with this man who lost his companion. He also projects himself. “During funerals, identification can cause emotion, burial awakens in us the fear of losing someone,” adds the psychosociologist.
Say it with your body
The dancing also makes this tribute quite unique and particularly moving. Firstly because Stefan Voirin’s aerial body movements instill joy and sweetness in the context of an extremely brutal murder. Then, as the gesture comes to honor what the deceased was. Agnes Lassalle and Stéphane Voirin danced often and long. “We met on the dance floor in 2010,” he confided in an interview given to the newspaper on February 25. Southwest . “The symbol is strong,” comments Dominique Picard, the man dances alone because he has lost his partner, he dances with his image, with his memory, when those who join him all dance as a couple.
The symbolism is strong, the man dances alone because he has lost his partner, he dances in his image, in his memory, when those who join him all dance in pairs;
Dominique Picard, psychosociologist
According to the psycho-sociologist, the art of dance itself is beyond words. In this tribute he says with music and body what speeches, and therefore language, sometimes say at funerals; death is a part of life. The lyrics of Nat King Cole’s song in French at the funeral of Agnes Lassalle support Stephane Voirin’s declaration of love for his companion and contribute to the emotion. “We can, for example, hear ‘I will not leave’, which can be understood as ‘I will stay with you’ or ‘You will never be far from me,'” suggests Dominique Picard.
Reactions to our understanding of death
If the vast majority of responses praised the beauty of the form of tribute, some commentators expressed indignation. “It’s very strange for me to dance at a funeral”, “The worst pains are silent. When we suffer death, we do not engage in such fancies,” we can read on Twitter? These reactions are related to our perception of death. In our culture, it should be sad, serious. We don’t laugh, we don’t talk during funerals, we have to be dignified. So for some, dancing next to a casket is unfathomable. Even more so in such a dramatic context as the death of Agnes Lassalle. During the tribute, however, there were no smiles on the faces of the dancers.
Others, a minority, went so far as to see it as an insult, a lack of respect. “In all civilizations, respect exists to the extent that it is shown. The only way to show that we respect someone is to show it, and we use the codes of culture to do that. Here, respect comes from codes, and for some, from respect,” adds Dominique Picard.
For some, it is incomprehensible to combine the expression of feelings associated with a happy moment with a time to pay respect.
Sarah Dumont
When it comes to behavior at funerals, the kind of standard you’ll need to meet is still onerous, says Sarah Dumont, the site’s founder. good ending , “a companion site to better experience death and mourning,” which, more specifically, accompanies one’s departure preparations, funeral arrangements, and the grieving experience. “For some, therefore, it is unimaginable to combine the expression of feelings associated with a happy moment with a time of celebration,” he continues. Not forgetting the fear of what to say. When funeral directors suggest something out of the ordinary to funeral directors, it’s very common to be told ‘it can’t be done’ or to wonder what people will think.’ But according to Sarah Dumont, judgments don’t matter. “When you are just, when you respect public order and when respect is given to the person of the deceased, everything is permissible.”
(1) Dominique Picard is a social relations specialist, author of several books on the subject.
In the video: “I know exactly what I’m talking about when I talk about domestic violence.” very excited, Avro Berge collides with the bronchi of the National Assembly.
Source: Le Figaro
