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Why should you stop giving advice to loved ones?

According to the British philosopher, we should allow our loved ones to make their own decisions. Getty Images:

According to British philosopher Farbod Akhlagi, guiding and advising loved ones in their choices prevents them from being autonomous and finding their own identity. Details.

“Should I accept this case?” “He assures me that he will make an effort, I give him a second chance, according to you. We all seek the opinion of a loved one to see things more clearly or to finally get an answer that we can’t (or no longer) find on our own. Only our friends are better off giving us any advice, according to Farbod Akhlagh, a philosopher and researcher at Christ’s College, Cambridge. The latter assures us in an article published on the journal de philosophie website on December 31. Analysis:transferred The Guardian: January 26. According to the specialist, interfering with life decisions can deprive a friend of autonomy and the search for identity.

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Violation of the right to self-determination

Philosopher Farbod Akhlaghi’s theme focuses on these choices that lead to what he calls “transformative” experiences. More precisely, any experience that provides knowledge or understanding of oneself that can only be gained after experiencing the experience; or any experience that alters the fundamental values ​​and desires of the person experiencing it.

The philosopher wonders. “Under what circumstances is it permissible to intervene to try to prevent someone from attempting conversion?” How can someone be deprived of learning about themselves? According to him, interfering with the decision-making of a loved one, expressing his opinion, would mean violating the “revealing autonomy” and “right to self-determination” of a person. And this, even if the advice is based on good intentions.

Decision-making should be done independently, he says. it is the only way to build an identity, to recognize our preferences and values. Interest, according to the philosopher. Realize that the person we have become is the result of our own decisions.

Good or bad decision.

Changing jobs, having a third child, choosing a certain course of study… Another reason should make us refrain from expressing our opinion. it is impossible to know what the consequences of the choice will be while the person has; do not have their experience. The only exception to his rule? A decision that will put an individual at risk. Farbod Akhlagi concludes: “Then it is our moral duty to intervene to try to prevent it.”

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Source: Le Figaro

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