The Ifop study, published on Thursday 1 December, examined the emotional and sexual life of young parents after the birth of a child.
Entering parenthood does not spare the couple’s romantic and sexual life. The finding is reaffirmed by a survey carried out by Ifop for Sleepyz.fr, based on the declarations of 1,001 women and men parents of children under 3 years old and published on Thursday, December 1. The survey focused on this new reality caused by the arrival of a child, and respondents were asked about their daily routines and intimacy.
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Surrender unwillingly
While childbirth is both a physical and emotional ordeal, the resumption of sex life, on average 7 weeks after birth, is more, and especially for women, the survey noted. Thus, more than one in five respondents (22%) say they have engaged in vaginal intercourse after giving birth to please their partner, but not really wanting to.
The gender gap widens when it comes to overall assessment of the quality of postpartum sexual activity. Fewer women (76%) than fathers (85%) say they are satisfied. The age of the respondents also affects this perception. while 84% of mothers aged 18 to 34 say they are satisfied, that proportion drops to 63% for those aged 35 to 49.
Disturbed relationship with the body
Delving deeper into these results, the researchers observed that the presence of a child can disrupt the framework conducive to a couple’s intimacy, causing a form of hypervigilance, chronic fatigue, and a de facto decline in sexual energy. From the point of view of mothers, however, this is not the main obstacle to their desire. Half of them (53%) said they avoided sex because their bodies weren’t comfortable. 83% of women emphasize that weight gain during pregnancy has affected their libido, and 80% express the fact of feeling less desirable in the eyes of their partner.
Childbirth, in spite of itself, also leaves the impression that one is more at home in one’s body and is accompanied by both mental and physical discomfort for some. Among women with decreased libido, 79% reported decreased vaginal sensations, 78% reported a negative opinion of the appearance of their genitals, and 76% reported pain during vaginal penetration.
Discuss your sexuality to better reconsider
In a previous article, clinical sexologist Camille Bataillon claimed: The key to postpartum sexuality is not knowing when to resume sex, but whether the desire is there. “Agreement is one of the foundations of a couple,” he emphasized.
Midwife Anna Roy reminded in another article that “nothing obliges us to resort to penetration immediately, the important thing is to study our own desire and discuss it with our partner”. Ideally, this conversation would be before birth, suggested clinical sexologist Camille Bataillon. “It’s time to redefine your sexuality with non-judgment and curiosity, planning intimate moments, pleasuring yourself and doing both at the same time,” she details. Before graduation. “All this takes time and kindness.”
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Source: Le Figaro
