Having strong self-esteem and self-confidence is not something you are born with. It is triggered, cultivated, goes away at certain moments in life, then returns at others. Deciphering a more complicated concept than it seems.
Maud Bailey, general manager of Accor group Sofitel, MGallery & Emblems, recalls this discussion when she was in charge of Southern Europe, “with a remarkable woman who explained to her that she was not sure whether to accept the promotion or not. said to him, fearing not to succeed. He answered: “But that’s not an option, I’m telling you that for your information. The scene had such an impact on him that he talked about it in a very formal LinkedIn post. “I assure you, this young woman has been extremely successful,” he continues. But this anecdote reminds us of the performance value of trust. And duty, for any leader to discover the talent of their teams, to push them with gentleness and determination to become who they are, overcoming fear, censorship, the gaze of others.
Like this young woman in total doubt, how many welcome the news of a promotion or ask for the news, questioning whether they really deserve it, even if they have the profile and the skills? Studies show that while men first strive to get to the next level and then complete their training, women wait until they are “120% legit” before they dare apply. And this basic advantage, which they often lack and cannot learn in school, keeps them behind the walls of the company. “Imposter syndrome is often spelled with an ‘e’,” emphasizes Caroline Roux, a well-known journalist and presenter.
” data-script=”https://static.lefigaro.fr/widget-video/short-ttl/video/index.js” >
Undisclosed location
There is no confidence gene. We cannot even say that it is innate. Some got it from childhood, surrounded by parents who made them well aware of their worth. Others have acquired it by observing an attitude that has become a role model, or because a role model that has become a mentor has flourished. For others, doubts disappear by looking back at their past and what they have already gone through or built. “What saves us,” writes Christian Bobin, “are the ruins of our ancient beliefs.” But how many search for them throughout their lives? As its etymology suggests, the confidence that comes to trust
(Latin for “to trust”), it is what is conveyed when we have faith in others, a degree of trust in them, a precise duty, a mission.
It is born from a look that takes us, separates our potential. From what we have built, of course, from the challenges set before us, from facing our own fears. It asks us to accept a lack of control. Undisclosed location. No comfort areas. Also accept that it is not a constant in our lives. “Obviously, it evolves, it’s fed, it’s maintained and it’s lost,” explains Charles Pepin. Which sums it up like this. trust should be considered not as a fixed stock, but as a flow.
There are times when we are desperate, others when we feel like queen of the world, the important thing is to have a method that allows us to fill the tank as quickly as possible.
Kathryn Barba, entrepreneur led by Envi
Share your doubts and your small victories
“There are times when we are desperate, others when we feel like queen of the world, what matters is the method that will allow us to fill the tank as quickly as possible,” explains entrepreneur and investor Catherine Barba. At the helm of Envi, where she supports many freelancers, she notes that the difference in a career path is not so much experience or skills as confidence. Therefore, he felt the need to pass it on to as many people as possible. On September 12, he launched Self-Confidence Day on social networks. Testimonies of women poured in under the hashtag #donnerconfidence. Everyone found a place to express their doubts and their small victories, to dispel anxiety in gratitude and in turn to become transmitters of confidence.
Because if we are lucky enough to receive it from a parent, friend or charity figure, we can also ensure that we pass it on in turn. This virtuous circle of sharing is what was envisioned Madame Figaro interviewing beloved personalities, today’s women in key positions. Actress, editor, minister, singer, journalist… all agreed to question the place of trust in their lives. And the path that led them to self-esteem. In their words, the idea of movement comes up again and again: “learning by walking”, “overcoming fear by doing”. Those around us too. these “others” we have been able to choose for their honesty and perspective, which allows us to move forward. So confidence is a muscle that needs to be exercised in the right environment. This is where it starts…
>> Find all testimonials here.
Source: Le Figaro
