Expert teaches how to deal with the end of a relationship

The end of a relationship is usually a very painful phase. The grief, the longing, the memories… Emotions are on the surface and feelings are touched.

the psychologist Alexander Bez spoke about the importance of mental health care at this delicate moment.

First, the specialist taught how to deal with the end of the relationship. “The best way to have a relational overcoming is to give up the possible comparative associations that people have. This is a classic mistake and almost generalized, depending on how the breakup was. To overcome the hurt, it is necessary to overcome forgetting this relationship and this is a very difficult task, mentally speaking. For this, it is necessary to eliminate comparison, and also transference. By arranging new relationships that can be associative, with traits that bring memories, mourning will never be elaborated. Every marital relationship needs to have a mourning. Remembering that a breakup, for many psychology authors, is considered a mourning and it is necessary to elaborate it.”he said.

Often, self-esteem is very shaken in these situations: “Depending on what caused the breakup, a betrayal, for example, generates a very big question of self-esteem for women. For men, it does not generate so much, because the male mentality is different. But for the female mind, this betrayal detonates self-esteem. So, to elevate it, some factors would already help. Like participating more with friends, doing the things you like best, taking care of yourself, valuing yourself, and especially, not blaming yourself. Never brooding over the past through psychological rumination.”🇧🇷

“The problem is that if you don’t deal with it immediately, this low self-esteem will cause sadness, which as a consequence can cause psychological depression, which comes from the outside in, and can end up causing more emotional disorders as a result of bereavement. already existing.”, said.

Is it time to meet someone new? The expert explained: “The answer is very simple: forgetting the chronological factor. It’s giving yourself time, especially the woman, remembering that endings are different for the female head and for the male head. So the woman really has to give herself more time, without be in a hurry to relate. All relationships, according to North American psychology authors, that start right after a breakup are doomed to marital failure. The best preparation is time, taking care of yourself and acquiring self-confidence.”🇧🇷

Finally, the psychologist talked about how to reduce the damage and trauma caused by the end of the relationship.

“They need to be reduced by raising self-esteem. We put together all the previous tips, comparisons and transfers, as well as self-esteem, as they are the basis, while all this is not resolved, there is no emotional preparation. The spark will continue to burn, and in the unconscious, will be thinking about the ex. It is necessary to build a path with great calm, perseverance and willpower.concluded the specialist.