In addition to the physical absence, losing a baby during pregnancy or after birth takes a toll on a family’s emotions; understand condition and how to deal with it!
Losing a baby during pregnancy or shortly after birth is an experience that goes beyond physical absence. Perinatal grief also involves the disruption of dreams, expectations and an idealized future, often surrounded by silence and a lack of understanding.
Recent cases, such as those of Sabrina Sato and Rafa Kalimannbrought visibility to the subject. As the perinatal psychologist explains Rafaela Schiavofounder of the MaterOnline Institute, these situations highlight the importance of welcoming practices and specialized support for families going through this experience.
The specialist answers the most frequently asked questions and offers guidance on how to face this delicate moment. See below:
What is perinatal grief?
Perinatal grief occurs when a baby is lost during pregnancy or in the first moments after birth. This experience is not limited to the physical absence of the baby, but also encompasses symbolic losses, such as mourning for not having the desired sex of the baby, for not being able to carry out the ideal birth or for difficulties related to breastfeeding. These are situations that interrupt expectations and need to be welcomed with empathy.
How is perinatal grief experienced by each person, and when to seek professional help?
Perinatal grief is a unique and deeply personal experience. Some people process the loss within weeks, while others may take months or longer. There is no right period for dealing with pain, as everyone has their own pace for facing changes. It is essential to observe whether sadness begins to affect everyday life.
When routine activities are compromised, there is prolonged isolation or thoughts of hopelessness, it may be time to seek specialized help. Psychologists and other mental health professionals can offer the support you need during this process.
How to cope with the loss of a baby?
Facing this loss requires accepting one’s feelings and allowing emotions, such as sadness and guilt, to be experienced without repression. Keeping baby memories, like clothes or photos, can help turn grief into something meaningful. Participating in support groups and having psychological support are essential to help overcome this problem.
What practices help create a meaningful farewell?
Humanized hospitals allow parents to see and hold the baby, if they wish, and offer the possibility of keeping souvenirs, such as photographs, footprints or a lock of hair. These actions help to give meaning to the moment of farewell. In countries like England, the use of refrigerated cribs allows parents to spend more time with their baby before burial.
How can hospitals better welcome grieving families?
An important measure is to separate mothers who have experienced loss from areas where newborn babies are, which helps to minimize suffering. Furthermore, humanized reception, with trained professionals and sufficient time to say goodbye, can alleviate some of the pain faced by families.
Does the father also feel grief?
Yes, and it must be included in the process. The father is often expected to be the “strong” one to support his partner, but he also suffers the loss and needs space to express his feelings. Mutual support within the couple is essential to strengthening the relationship and helping to overcome it.
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Are there other types of grief in the perinatal period?
Yes. In addition to physical loss, grief can occur in situations such as receiving an unexpected diagnosis, discovering that the baby’s sex is not the desired one or experiencing difficulties breastfeeding. These symbolic losses also cause suffering and deserve acceptance.
Why avoid phrases that minimize the pain of loss?
Expressions like “it was better this way” or “it was God’s will” may seem comforting, but they end up invalidating the feelings of those who are experiencing the loss. The ideal is to offer an attentive, non-judgmental listening and respect the time of mourning.
Why is it important to talk about perinatal grief?
Stories like those of Sabrina and Rafa Kalimann show that perinatal grief is more common than one might imagine. Talking about the topic helps to break taboos, validate families’ suffering and promote more empathetic and humanized reception practices.
Source: Maxima
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I am an experienced author and journalist with a passion for lifestyle journalism. I currently work for Buna Times, one of the leading news websites in the world. I specialize in writing stories about health, wellness, fashion, beauty, interior design, and more. My articles have been featured on major publications such as The Guardian and The Huffington Post.