Everything TOP said in his first interview in 11 years

Surprising fans,TOPformer member of the iconic K-pop group BIGBANG, broke his silence of more than a decade and, for the first time since 2014, gave an interview to The Korea Times. On January 15, the artist spoke openly about his participation in the second season of “Round 6”, his reflections on his departure from the boy group and the impact of controversies on his life.

Performance in ‘Round 6’

The singer’s return to the spotlight came when he was cast to play Thanos, a character who, in many ways, reflects the shadows of his own trajectory. The role of TOPwho plays a bankrupt and drug-dependent rapper, was, according to him, a decision full of ambiguity.

When approached by the producer to audition for the role, the actor revealed that he initially felt uncomfortable with the possibility of his image being irrevocably associated with such a dark and self-destructive character: “I worried a lot, thinking that my image could become permanently associated with that,” he admitted, referring to the fear that the character reflected the mistakes of his past, including his conviction for substance use during his military service.

However, the artist explained that, throughout the process, he felt that this role could be a way of coping: “I felt like it could be something deeper, as if it were destiny pulling me towards this”, he said. After recording an audition video and sending it to production, the director Hwang Dong-hyuk He demonstrated confidence in his talent, which gave the actor the courage he needed to move forward.

When talking about the creation of Thanos, the artist explained that his character was supposed to be a caricature of failure: “Thanos is a little stupid, pathetic and ignorant, characteristics that are reflected in scenes like the rap during the game ‘Red Light, Green Light’. It was from there that the character began to take shape”, he revealed. His performance sparked discussion, but he accepted the diversity of opinion with humility, recognizing that the impact of his performance is beyond his control.

“Of course, I believe that likes and dislikes are something I should accept. I will humbly accept everything as it is,” he said.

Regarding rumors of nepotism, he said: “Instead of feeling wronged, I was more sad because I thought I could be harming such a great project,” he commented. TOP also expressed remorse for acting veterans who he said could have been misunderstood because of him.

Return to BIGBANG?

During the interview, TOP also expressed his regret and affection for the members and fans of BIGBANG, a group that played a fundamental role in his life. “I spent my twenties in a brilliant way that no one else could compare to, through BIGBANG. It was a beautiful moment,” he recalled. However, he acknowledged that his mistakes negatively impacted the team. “I regret that my mistake caused a lot of harm to the team and the members were reprimanded together,” he said.

The rapper revealed that, even though he was away, he continued to closely follow BIGBANG’s trajectory, especially during the group’s performance at MAMA 2024.

“I also watched BIGBANG’s performance at the ‘2024 MAMA Awards’ late last year,” he shared.

TOP expressed a sense of pride mixed with regret at seeing the members move on. Regarding his departure from the group, he explained that he made the decision to step aside to avoid causing more harm to BIGBANG: “I don’t want to cause any more harm to the members, so I announced my intention to leave the team. About five years later, I separated from the group. group,” he said.

When asked about the possibility of a return to BIGBANG, he was emphatic:

“No, I can’t go back. The reason is that I no longer have a face”, referring to the shame he feels related to the past.

He also revealed that he accepted an invitation to the project ‘Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter (2022)’, believing it would be the last opportunity to be with the group in front of the fans, as a farewell.

Retirement and fresh start

Over the past seven years, the artist has dedicated himself to music, distancing himself from the entertainment industry. During this period, he revealed feeling deep self-loathing and guilt. “After making so many mistakes, I had so much self-loathing and guilt,” he confessed. The singer stepped away to reflect on his actions and face feelings of emotional exhaustion, explaining: “I just went back and forth between my house and the music studio. I could only breathe when I was making music. That’s when I was able to get out of my head a little bit. darkness.”

Asked about a possible album release, TOP revealed that, although it was still too early to announce anything concrete, there are plans for a new musical project. “We’re planning soon,” he said, suggesting his solo journey still has a lot to offer.

Retiring from music in 2020, for him, was a way to step away from the spotlight and seek a more balanced life. “If I were to imagine my 40s, I hope to live as a responsible and stable man, like any ordinary young man in Korea,” he said. He also emphasized the importance of a healthy and peaceful life, away from negative news. “I want to wake up in the morning and not find negative articles about me,” he said, reflecting on his search for inner peace.

During the interview, the artist repeated several times his desire to apologize to everyone who was affected by his actions. “I want to apologize to all of you. I think it may take some time for the public to accept [as desculpas] because I was very careless in the past. I don’t think the public treats me harshly,” he said, adding: “No matter how long it takes, it’s a problem I have to solve and it’s entirely up to me.”

Now, at 37 years old, TOP seeks to rewrite his history, not just as an artist, but as a person, in search of a new beginning. “I hope to see them in good shape in the future. I will reflect on my dark time. I will try to live in a better way than anyone else,” he concluded. His participation in the second season of Round 6 represents not only a return to acting, but also an opportunity to rebuild his image and live in a way that is comfortable for himself.

Also read: Round 6: Why did Thanos get his name? Director explains