Are you self-sabotaging? These signs prove yes

Your to-do list grows by the day, but nothing gets done. It is impossible to overcome these mountain tasks that seem insurmountable to you. Despite the anxiety creeping up on you, you keep procrastinating. However, this common form of self-sabotage is not the only one. “Self-sabotage is any action that gets in the way of your goals, undermines your well-being, or hinders your growth,” defines American neuropsychologist Nawal Mustafa, better known as Thebraincoach on Instagram. In a recent social media post published on Tuesday, September 10, the expert elaborates on these delicate situations where we willingly or unwittingly put up obstacles.

Stay in your comfort zone

When you go out drinking with your friends, it’s always the same bar. Perhaps you find it difficult to leave your “comfort zone,” this “safe, familiar space where we feel good and integrates our daily lifestyle habits,” as defined by clinical psychologist Celia Moller. The origin of this problem is generally a deep fear of change. This is what makes us make excuses for our bad habits or postpone important things until later, adds neuropsychologist Nawal Mustafa.

Ignoring your own needs

Sometimes it’s in your relationships with others that your self-sabotage strategies also lie, notes @thebraincoach. This can include saying yes to everything to the point of burnout, not communicating your expectations, not talking about things that are important to you, or even staying in a relationship that is harmful to your mental health.

Being locked into limiting beliefs

The power of the mind is such that it sometimes imposes upon us limiting beliefs that promote self-sabotage. So, for X reasons and often deep guilt, some people feel they don’t deserve positive things in their lives. “It’s an act of self-betrayal when you convince yourself that you don’t really want the things you know (deep down) will be good for you,” paraphrases Nawal Mustafa.

These negative thoughts feed on themselves and lead to other thoughts. There are times when we worry too much about our future, or on the contrary, we cling too much to the past, says the neuropsychologist. And when these ideas overwhelm us, they take us away from the present moment, the only moment we can act on.

How to get out of this vicious cycle? In a previous post published in June, the specialist invited “subscribers” to self-sabotage to assess their true needs and set healthy boundaries, whether with themselves or in their relationships with others. He also expressed the idea of ​​challenging his “inner critic” and silencing him and his limiting thoughts a little more each day.