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“We end up to be afraid to sleep.” With backward insomnia when grief disturbs our nights

If love is the sorrows are universal, their effects on our sleep are as many. Glass and tips from a neuropsych.

Love fractures leave traces beyond the broken heart especially when they end in pain. They interfere in our nights, transform our habits and sometimes even prevent this shelter supposed to be our bedroom. In the evening, this bed, which has become too large, has come to sleep, the brain, which is endlessly recovering and “postter insight.”.

Light depressive state for observer

It is no coincidence that so many people accept sleep after separation. “After a depressive state of light, after almost coordinated collapse, it stimulates sleep disorders, in particular, the difficulties of falling asleep,” said a nervous and pair of therapists, author. Couple. Heritage family (Ed. Larus).

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Sleep Time is especially enormous because everyday mask falls. “Once in bed, we are cut off from all the incentives that we have during the day, and which can distract us, both work or friends, and we are alone in front of us and our negative thoughts.” Our brain, deprived of distractions, then focus on what prevents. It regrets, unanswered questions, warnings about the future.

And if we are not doing anything, this phenomenon stretches on its own and makes us enter the vicious circle. The more we sleep, the less we sleep. “The more we predict, the more he is worried, and we end up and we are afraid to sleep.”

Disoriented senses and rituals

It should also be said that breaking not only is the end of love, but also the disappearance of the sensual and emotional benchmark. Because the couple indicates that the partner plays an important role in our night rituals, often unconsciously. His simple physical presence in bed, his occupied territory, his familiar noises, his smells, but his daily gestures such as kiss, hug, sex, forms a soothing whole.

And when the separation comes. The absence becomes the most popular, by transforming a painful reminding every evening. “When we gained emotional security thanks to her husband’s presence, it is difficult to get rid of it,” said the specialist, who compares this loss from its comfort.

When should you be worried?

There is no need to panic slightly hard to sleep, according to the neuropsych. This phenomenon is frequent, especially during the first week and, of course, disappears with the right means. “We must clearly separate insomnia in insomnia from chronic insomnia,” said the specialist. But if the difficulties last for more than three months, at least three times a week, less than four hours, you should consult your doctor. “Other signals need to intervene faster. The appearance of suicide thoughts and the general inability to work every day.

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In connection with this test, several strategies can still help to find sleep more calmly. Ginevra Uguccioni claims the importance of re-registration of its evenings, first of all by restarting the bed area. We can thus consider the mattress size if the area seems too large or pads around you to fill the physical vacuum to break the silence.

What to do

Some reflexes, although tempting, are ineffective. To consult with the Instagram account about your former past, Breadtime is undoubtedly a very bad idea to read the old messages. “This stimulus directly revives the absence of another and restarts the cycle of the Romanations,” said the couple’s therapist. Similarly, by systematically escaped the old married bed by sleeping with friends, they can probably dress up on a wooden foot.

What if the vibes lead you short when touching a pillow? Give them, literally, offers Ginevra uguccioni. “We can plan for half an hour during the week to hear them, let them speak, and especially ask them,” he explains. For example, “I will only be alone my whole life” “I’m alone now, but that doesn’t mean I’ll be alone all my life.”

Overcoming the decay, it requires a general reconstruction job. The specialist claims the importance of the development of external and internal resources to better support this vacuum pass. And this refers to the strengthening of friendly and family ties, sometimes with strengthening therapy, sports, artistic practice. “Writing is doing great when it comes to resisting difficult emotions,” Gainev Ugukchion views. And who knows, with time, maybe you will be overwhelmed by enjoying the soloist of the stars in your bed.

Source: Le Figaro

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